Wanda's Thoughts
by Agent-G
Summary: Wanda has a journal she now rights in, what exactly goes through her mind? Well come and find out. Please R&R and this is part of my AGU series. [Complete]
1. 1st entry

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN X-MEN: EVOLUTION OR ANYTHING FROM MARVEL, ANY OCs ARE MINE.  
  
IMPORTANT: A/N: FOR THOSE NEW PEOPLE THIS IS PART OF MY AGU SERIES SO YOU MIGHT MISS A FEW THINGS IF YOU HAVEN'T READ THE OTHER STORIES, THIS TAKES PLACE NEAR THE BEGINNING OF 'ADJUSTMENTS'  
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**WANDA'S THOUGHTS**

I can't believe I'm doing this...writing in a diary, this is just so...girly. I mean just because Xavier gave me this as a way to deal with my anger issues was insane enough as it was, the fact that I'm actually writing this is even worse. He said I should write down anything I couldn't share with the others, and to tell the truth there's a LOT I couldn't say to these people.

How the hell can I just tell anyone the things I've gone through. I mean these guys used to be my enemies. But here I am living with them...I didn't see this coming, I mean at the Brotherhood sure we weren't exactly living under the best conditions but we were close...at least I thought we were.

Imagine my surprise when I found out they knew about my so-called FATHER WAS MESSING WITH MY HEAD! I mean they were SUPPOSED to be my friends but they did they tell me? Did my so-called brother tell me? Did Toad who said he loved me tell me?

HELL NO!

God! I just feel so betrayed! I trusted them! They were the first people I can remember that I trusted! They were my first friends and they lied to me cause it was more continent to THEM that I was changed...why couldn't they have accepted me? I know I was angrier then, but I was trying damn it! I was...it was so hard to fit in when Mystique got me out of that place...I...I just wanted to fit in...but how do you fit in when you spent most of your life locked up in small rooms.

Even now I hate small places, they just remind me of horrible times...but then for a little while I thought I might have to go back when my original and the fake memories started to battle it out in my mind...I though I was going insane...I was hurting so much but I felt I couldn't trust the Brotherhood, and I was right.

If I had told them, especially Pietro...well...I don't want to think of what Magneto would have done to me. But I got him back. I ruined his plans and helped the X-Men save their friends and even family from him. The fact that I betrayed him and joined Xavier...well...I'll admit. That puts a smiled on my face thinking what that does to him.

It may not be the kind of revenge I wanted on him but it will do...for now. When I see him again though it won't be pleasant for him.

I hate him.

I just hate that man.

After all he's done do me I can't remember the last time he ever did anything FOR me. I never knew mother so he was all I had. He wasn't much of a father even before he had me locked up.

But here I am...the only member of the old Brotherhood still here...well that's not true. Rogue was a member long before me and so was Tabitha, but I wasn't there when they were still members. I still can't believe they choose to side with HIM.

Although after those FOH jerks burnt down our home and then HE had to come and save the day...I still don't but it. He was there at the perfect moment, I can't prove it but it wouldn't surprise me if he was somehow involved. But now the others don't trust humans even more then ever...I can see their point but still...Magneto is wrong...he would do everything and anything to further his plans, and everyone is expendable...even family.

So here I am writing in a...you know I'll just called it a journal instead of a diary, it's more me anyway, and if anyone is reading this (especially YOU Bobby) I will HURT you BADLY and you know I mean it.

Xavier had tried to help me for months, but he couldn't get through all my anger, at least now he was a second chance...maybe we both do. He has tried to help me with my anger, and it's slow...but I'm getting there a little.

Well I think that's all I got to say about most of my past...for now. As for my present...it's like I said, it's different.

It's already been a little over a week and I think I'm getting the hang of this place...that...and I stopped getting lost at least. Although I could do without two things, the Danger Room and the studying.

I've never had to train before and after just a few of those, two things suddenly made them selves clear to me. The first is that now I can see why the X-Men always seemed to outdo the Brotherhood. With training like that it's no wonder they're good. Another is wondering how they even stand after those. (Especially those dame early morning ones, sometimes I think Logan lives to torment the students.)

I mean after my first one I was sweating and aching so much I just went to my room and slept for an hour.

Now the studying is another matter. Although it's not like I got a lot to do all of this isn't so easy. I mean Xavier wanted me to experience school, which I didn't go to when I was with the Brotherhood but he wants me to have an education. Personally I think I'd rather be home schooled, I don't like the idea of going to Bayville High after the summer, but then Xavier said she shouldn't be afraid of the outside world.

The truth is...I am.

I've had the world pass me by and ever since I got out I still felt like I've been trying to catch up.

But at least I'm not alone in this. X23 or Sarah Logan as she's calling herself now, at least she's in the same boat as me. So she's younger but she's got the same anger as me, was locked up and well, her life has sucked just as much as mine if not more so. Although for some reason she kind of likes the studying.

Especially the history for some reason, I guess I might have to ask her at one point why. But at least she has a dad that seems to want to care for her. Logan is as close to a biological father that she's got, and he definitely tries his best to be a father, but it's obvious he has no idea where to start.

But at least he tries. That's more then my own ever did for me...she's lucky in that regard. I see them at times and the few times when they seem to bond or get close I find myself wishing that I had that in my life. I wish I had someone who cared for me like she does...but I don't...I don't think I ever did or will.

Times like this I wish mom was alive...but I was told she died at childbirth...I wish I got to know her. I wanted to know her, but Magneto never talked about her much at all. I not only did I lose my mother but everything that was her. I got nothing of her, not even an image of what she looked like...I think I'll write about something else...this is just...too painful to get into now.

The others here are sort of okay once you get to know them. I can't believe that I got Rogue of all people as a roommate, but at least we're not fighting all the time now. I will admit we do have a lot in common. We were both manipulated by our parents had our minds messed with, tried to kill said parents. So at least she had another person I could relate to, but mostly we just complain to the other about them. But that's nice too. At least we both get a chance to let out some steam with each other.

We're not best friends or anything but at least we're getting along.

I hate to admit it but what Vince did was a good thing. Although he better not do anything like that again or I will make sure he won't be happy.

Now Vincent...he's another thing. I never got to really know that guy, hell the first time I met him was with the others when he, Rouge, Tabby and Sam were coming out of the movies. At first I thought he was just some new guy, but after he made a fool of Pietro I had to admit the guy wasn't so bland at first glance after all.

Of course when we told Magneto about him and he actually looked worried, well then I was curious. I'll have to ask around to see what his story is, plus those scars on his back I saw at the pool...well...I get the feeling it's not a nice story, I've heard a few things but not the entire story.

Now as for Jean and Scott...well...they're trying to make me feel like I fit in, it's just that I think they're trying a little TOO hard in my opinion. So I've been trying to avoid them for the moment, I can only take so much goody, goody stuff, before my stomach turns slightly.

Tabitha is nice enough though, at least she was more like a true member of the old Brotherhood so I'm feeling like I can relate to her more. I mean when she took me to see the old Brotherhood place as a final farewell it was a nice thought, even if I didn't tell her. I was completely shocked that there was construction going on.

I mean my old home burnt down and they just up and build over it like it didn't matter at all. Not that I'm surprised. No one in this town really liked us, or that place, even before mutants were exposed to the world. But it did get worse when mutants were exposed, and THANK YOU FATHER FOR THAT!

I still don't know what goes though that think, helmeted head of his, and I really don't want to know either.

Then there was that Selene woman. I didn't like her from the moment I saw her, and how she freaked out that Amara girl was another thing I didn't like. Amara isn't that bad, so she can be a little stuck up, but she also seems shy and slightly insecure at times too, so I think she acts stuck up at times so she tries and hide it her shyness and insecurities from the others.

I still remember that sleep over we had, it was my first and I was actually having a good time. It was strange to actually connect with the girls like that. Even the human friends they got. I'll admit Amy and Pam seem nice.

And boy when Gale kissed Amy and she LIKED it! That was a shocker. I mean I got nothing against gays or anything, it just seemed to come out of left field. Plus the highlight for me was when he got to punish those boys who thought they could spy on us.

I don't think I've ever had that much fun in my life.

Then there are the others too. I never really got to know them and I still am so I don't have much to say. Same with the adults for now, although I will say this...Logan really needs to either get a hobby or get laid. That guys nearly always seems to be in a foul mood and he really needs to chill out...I can't believe ME of all people think that...he must be more worse off them ME if I think that.

Well I think that's enough for now...I hate to admit this even to myself, but I actually feel a little better. But I'll only admit it here...maybe I'll even write some more...I don't know I guess I'll just have to see what the future holds.


	2. 2nd entry

Richard-Raven-Croft: Well I did take an introduction course to physiology but other then that I guess it's just a talent I never really knew I had.

Xmenfan: Well here you are, and you'll she what she thinks of them and a few others too. BTW what's that IMO you put in the review mean?

The Uncanny R-Man: Thanks, and yeah I know what you mean.

slickboy444: Yeah I always liked her too, and I wanted something to focus on her.

Ldypebsaby: My thoughts exactly, which is why I did this so I could finally let her say what's on her mind.

Red Witch: You should check out 'in the mirror' for more deep stuff like that.

celtcath74: I'm thinking of doing some more don't worry.

Ruby631: Yeah I know that line was just too true.

**AN: I'd like to say that a special thanks out to Ruby631 and her story Reality Trip: The Lost Chapter, for giving me the idea how to start this next chapter out. So if you want to know more check it out.**

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**WANDA'S THOUGHTS  
  
**Well here I am again writing in this thing. I still can't believe I wrote it the first time, but today was just too weird, well it started off as weird and then it...well...changed, but I'll get to that.

First off I've noticed that ever since I got here for some reason Kurt seems to have been avoiding me. And whenever we're in the same room he gets slightly nervous. Also I noticed that Amanda was pleasant enough but I kept getting this strange undertone with her, and when me and Kurt AND he was in the same room she kept giving me looks, and I swore if I touched Kurt the wrong way she would have used those force blasts of her's on me.

Today I got fed up with it and cornered Kurt and asked him what was going on. He denied all of it of course, but then again I was a little more 'persistent' with him and he cracked. He got me and Amanda together in his room and they came clean.

Apparently on this little trip into other realities that those two and a few of the others went on (what is it about this place, can't they do any NORMAL?) anyways, apparently they ran into these three teenagers and get this...all three were different kids of Rogue's.

Yeah two girls and a boy. They all had Rogue as their mom in different realities but all three had different fathers though. Well they knew this other group of mutants called the Exiles or something and there was this one girl TJ that was the daughter of yet ANOTHER version of Kurt and...well...ME!

Now don't get me wrong Kurt's a nice guy, and kind of sweet, but I don't think of him that way. So when they told me that I suddenly realized why they were acting like that. And I tell you I laughed my ass off. I mean I never laughed like that in my whole life. I was bent over and actually had tears coming out of my face at one point.

I mean they were worried about THAT! I mean get real! After a moment they joined in, in the laughter. We talked it out and well they realized that they were being a little foolish. Now at least those two seemed to have stopped acting weird around me.

Me and Kurt...I just don't see it. That other me must have been completely different from me or something, I mean that's like me going out with a...I don't know...a robot or something. I just can't picture it.

But it makes me think. When I se all the couples around here I feel this void in my life. The only guy I ever had interested in me was Toad, and that's nothing to be proud of. Hell he's also the only guy that I've ever kissed (I had to use a whole bottle of mouthwash to get the taste out when I got back). Well that's not entirely true...there was someone else, but that was just to thank him for the lift back, and for helping me out when those punks hand my hands restraint...I still don't want to think what would have happened if he hadn't shown up.

Yeah well I know he was just stopping by, and sure he lives in New York (but that's less then an hour away). Besides it would be kind of hard to call a guy that wears a mask and who I don't know his real name.

But that's beside the point, when I see all those damn couples all happy and stuff...I just feel...so lonely. I can't remember when I started to feel like this, but sometimes I wonder if I'll find someone out there...I can't believe I'm thinking like this...but I missed out on a lot of things that normal girls take for granted.

I've never been out on a date, never had to sneak out, never got dumped, never got to go to a dance...never been in love...

Sometimes I think the only two emotions I got left are my rage...and my sadness.

I unloaded all my problems with Ororo today along with Blink. She's a good girl and has had it tough ever since her mutation kicked in. We talked today and I learned a few about the both of them. It's so strange, when I was with the Brotherhood I thought the X-Men (can't remember when I stopped thinking them as X-geeks) were all perfect and everything.

Now I see almost everyone has some kind of pain or troubled past. I mean what happened to Blink was bad, not to mention Ororo and her sister. I learned a few things about the others too. I know about Tabitha and that jerk of a father, so I know how that feels, probably another reason I can relate to her more then the others at the moment.

Then I can only imagine what Kurt had to go through life not being able to hide his appearance. I mean I JUST found out today that Scott and Alex's parents died in a plane crash when they were kids. I mean having to say goodbye to your parent and see then die like that...no wonder Scott is all serious and stuff, I'm just guessing Alex either hides his pain better or was too young at the time.

Then there's Dani losing her parents, no one knows how all they know is that she lived with her grandfather after they died. There's also Ray who was kicked out of his home by his parents, Gale who had her mother die in a car accident when she was ten, Rahne who never knew her own mother because she died in child birth...I know how that feels, never to know you mother...but at least she seems to like her adopted one, I forget her name, but she seems to care about her though.

Rogue has also been though a lot, and when I finally asked what the hell was up with her boyfriend's past...well...I'm just surprised the guy isn't screwed up like that new guy Magneto has with him. I also saw a picture of that April girl...I had heard what had happened to her from Lance when Kitty had come over the day she had died.

I remember she came over in tears to the Brotherhood place and Lance tried to comfort her. I saw her crying on his chest and overhear her talking about this new girl that had died. I found out how she died today...it wasn't fair...to only live free for a few days then to die like that...why must there be so much pain...so much hurt in life?

Everyone here seems to have been effected to some degree of some kind of tragedy, or pain...I thought I was alone in that regard...I though I was the only one that hurt...that felt pain in my life...that no one could understand...I was wrong.

Now I see one of the reasons everyone here is so close...they are there for each other, they've gone through something horrible together, they suffered together and they've all come out of it together...stronger then they were.

They aren't just friends because they like each other (which they do) but because they all feel connected to each other, that they can trust one another...I wonder if I will ever be like that?

It doesn't sound so bad...to be with a group that accepts you and would help you when you need it...and that I can trust...I've been burned so many times in my life I'm not sure I can trust anyone again...but I want to and I think I might find that here.

I want to feel like I belong, but I still feel like an outsider so far...sure everyone has been nice to me...but I just don't have those bonds of friendship that the others have. I wonder if this is how Piotr feels too? Although the fact he and Kitty seem to be getting pretty close might help him out to fit in more.

X23-I mean Sarah, seems to be having a little trouble fitting in like I am...but at least she has her friend Paige to help her fit in. Those two seem to be getting along fine, not surprising since they're both tomboys at heart and are roommates. Plus they were together in that cell Magneto had them in...I guess after going through that together you can't help but form a friendship.

Sure me and Rogue got a lot in common too, but we're also clashing a bit. I mean it's kind of like two magnets that are the same polarity pushing against each other...did I just use a SCIENCE TERM?!

I guess I learned something from all the studying after all. Who knew?

But the day had at least one good point to it. I walked into the living room and found Rogue and Vincent watching some old looking show. I asked what they were watching and when they told me an older Canadian show about a vampire cop. I thought to give it a chance. It was actually pretty good considering it didn't have the budget of Angel. (I'm still pissed they cancelled that show, first Buffy now this. I miss Spike and I don't mean Evan)

Although that LaCroix character was kind of freaky, kind of reminded me of Magneto only with more class, but I'll admit that cop guy Nick was hot in his day. Although the show is about fifteen or more years old or something so he most likely doesn't look like that anymore, but I liked it.

Kind of an Angel meets a police show, but without all the demons and magic and stuff. At least now I got something interesting to watch for a while.

Things are getting a little better I think...sure the studying sucks, and the training can be a pain...but I'm started to make some friends here at least. Ororo is much nicer then I thought she would be, I never really got to know her before I moved in and it's nice...nice to have someone like her here, she's kind, caring to us. Sometimes I think if my mom was alive she would be like her.

Blink seems nice too, a little shy at times but she seems like a nice kid...maybe I'll also take up that offer of Tabitha's to go out with some of the girls tonight...I could use the time away from here, and it would be nice to hang out with a few other girls. That was something I never had back at the Brotherhood, surrounded by guys 24-7 can get a little well, insane. Especially considering who I was stuck with at the time.

Well that's all for now I guess, maybe this thing isn't so bad after all...I may not be comfortable talking to the others about some of this, but I can still get it out of me at least.


	3. 3rd entry

Richard-Raven-Croft: lol, I had thought of writing a novel but I don't got the time to plan it all out or write it, sorry it would be cool to try but sorry, maybe one day I will but that might be years off.

Xmenfan: Sorry no Wanda/Kurt relationship, I think he could just be a good friend at one point since I already got her and Amanda and I don't want to mess with that. Xavier is in this chapter so there you go, and I thought Xavier's would be the best place for her, that's why I had her there at this point. As for the boyfriend...I think she needs to settle in first before that don't you think? That and I'm not sure who to set her up with.

D-M-N-W-T: Kurt and Wanda got together in an alternate future in the comics and had a girl named TJ AKA Nocturne, and no they're not going to be together he's already got a girlfriend remember? Although I don't know why you think she's crazy. Oh and Van I wouldn't piss her off, remember that even Magneto was afraid of her so I'd start running.

jadestar123/pippo23: Don't worry I got an idea of who to hook her up with in adjustments you'll see who.

slickboy444: Yeah so do I but he's taken. I have thought of doing a Wanda/Kurt story and a Blink/Kurt one too sometime, of course this would be a stand alone one and not part of the AGU series.

Ldypebsaby: Don't worry I just got an idea of who she could fall for, you'll see him soon enough.

Ruby631: You're welcome, and yes she is protective can you blame her? The last girl that was interested in Kurt tried to steal him from her then kidnapped him.

Fire inu: Thanks, and I will.

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**WANDA'S THOUGHTS**  
  
Well here I am again, I'm still not sure why the hell I keep writing in this thing but I'm still not comfortable talking to the others about some of this stuff.

Well today I had a morning session with Xavier. Basically all we do is talk, well he tries to get me to talk, it's just that I don't want to...the things he wants me to talk about. Magneto, the Asylum...those are things I DON'T want to talk OR think about.

But at least he cares...that's more then anyone other then Agatha has done for me. It's strange, I remember all the times when Xavier came to see me, he tried to help me but I was so angry...to afraid even to let him.

I was so wound up I didn't know what was going on most of the time. That's another thing I lost while I was in that place...time. It seemed to drag on forever and yet went by so quickly, I didn't know what day, month or even year it was for the longest time. I never had a birthday or saw a calendar while I was in there so I never knew how much time was passing. All I knew was it was either morning, noon or night (At least when they didn't put me in that cage) and that was it.

I never knew how old I was until I saw the date when I got the Brotherhood house, well after I calmed down at seeing Pietro that is. I still don't get why he never came for me...he's supposed to be my brother, why didn't he come for me? Leaving me the first time I can understand, we were just children, never coming for me, lying to me about my memories, then he left me again to go off with Magneto...again...I don't know if I can ever forgive him for that and I don't know if I want to either.

Well back to Xavier now. At least Xavier he actually CARES. I mean sure I think his dream is a little far fetched, but at least it's something worth working for and he does it without treating everyone here like underlings, that they're expendable or useless and leaves them to fend for themselves or in the charge of psychos...well Logan comes close to that but he may be tough but at least fair.

That's what I just don't get about him...WHY does he care so much. In our sessions and when I see him interact with the others I see him as a caring father figure to them all. When I see him like that...well...it makes me wish my father had been more like him...sometimes...I even wish Xavier WAS my father.

I know that's sounds insane and stupid...but he makes me feel calm and safe. Being here with him and the others is definitely the best place I've ever lived, and there's a sense of 'family' here I never really had. Sure I still feel out of place...but at least it's a nice place to be while feeling that.

Xavier has tried so much to help me...I...I don't know why but...I'm starting to feel like I don't want to disappoint him. He's put some trust in me and had opened his home to me and also I'll admit his sessions have helped me a little.

Plus I'm also thinking of having regular tea sessions with Ororo and Blink now. I'm beginning to like it, it's nice to sit back and relax at times. Blink is a bit naive and a little shy...but she's honest and kind. Ororo is like the perfect mother figure.

Actually I'm getting used to a regular schedule now. Training sessions in the Danger Room, or Xavier's sessions one day, then a few hours of studying various subjects. I don't have much free time but I'm not complaining.

Back in the Brotherhood place all I had was free time and I was so boring at least now I got stuff to do to keep me busy. Although I'm not looking forward to going to school...I don't think I'm ready for that, but Xavier, Hank and Ororo keep telling me I'll be fine...but I just don't know, I'm still getting used to all the people here, a whole school full of people, most of whom will hate me just because I'm a mutant isn't a pleasant thought either...yeah home schooling is looking better all the time. At least it will be in a familiar and safe environment.

But Xavier says I need to be prepared to live in the outside world. How can I live in a world I was shut away from for most of my life and is filled with people who hate and fear me? Well...not all...Amy and Pam are proof of that. Although Amy is a little timid at least Ray's girlfriend Pam is a little more outgoing, in fact she reminds me of a brunette version of Tabitha...now there's a scary thought, more then one Tabitha in the world.

I actually met Amy's little brother Joseph that is dating Rahne. I'm not sure if they are 'officially' a couple but he seemed nice, even if I only met him for a few minutes as he wait to take her out somewhere, but he didn't look at me as a freak or with hatred so he's better then most of the people I meet.

I swear trying to find a moments peace around here is hard. It's either every room is filled with the others arguing, playing or making out, at least they are before Logan walks in. I mean it's so hilarious when I see the boys literally jump off and away from the girls when they see or hear that low threatening growl of his. Just today I saw Jubilee and Bobby (I have no idea what she sees in that annoying prankster) making out slightly on the couch, and they were really getting into it from the moans Jubilee was doing, I saw Logan and I had a very cruel yet very funny idea.

I waved him over and pointed to the room. Logan was about to ask what was I pointing at but then Jubilee moaned again and I swear at the speed his head snapped to the left I though he was going to break his own neck. Then he stalked over and gave that growl of his. I swear Bobby looked so pale and was so scared for his life I thought he was going to faint.

I left trying to hold my laughter in before Logan gave them his speech on what he thought was 'inappropriate' behavior. That guy may act all tough but he's got this soft spot and he is REALLY protective of the girls. Most likely he's trying to protect their 'virtue' or something old fashioned like that. I wonder what he'd do if he found out about Jean and Scott? I also got to wonder how those two have kept it from Logan's nose and Xavier.

Anyway now whenever I need a laugh I just think of Bobby's reaction, it always does the trick. You know...I'm having a lot more fun living here then at the Brotherhood, plus you never know what is going on. Plus I like the pool table.

I never played but Sam, Tabitha and Ray showed me how and apparently I was pretty good for my first try. Of course Tabitha took the opportunity for Sam to 'help' her with all her shoots by having Sam right behind her with his hands on her's. Of course Ray told me she was just as good if not better then Sam but those two just liked to 'help' each other like that.

Thankfully when Ray helped me he kept it clean, because I doubt his girlfriend would like that and he REALLY wouldn't if he tried a move like that on me. I also leaned about some of the chores that everyone had to do. Apparently there's this list or something so I had to spend over an hour with the laundry duties with Jamie.

I don't see why he needs to be paired up with anyone, I mean he made several of his clones to help out but then I found out that normally they have the laundry split up with the boys and girls. He told me some days they do either just the boys or girls first then the other depending if anyone hasn't done their own. Mainly the oldest kids do their own mainly because whoever does their own laundry gets out of that duty...mental note: DO YOUR LAUNDRY FROM NOW ON!

I really don't want to look through the kinds of underwear some of the others wear, that's information I could live without thank you very much.

Luckily I learned how to do laundry at the brotherhood place...out of necessity of course but at least here they washers and dryers actually work all the time. Plus I don't see any underpants still in it. I still get chills of horror when I remember finding both Todd and Fred's boxers in the washer. God I never want to go through that again.

But Jamie was nice at least. He tried to make small talk but I let him talk most of the time. He told me how Forge had been working on this suit to contain his powers but for over a month he STILL couldn't work out the bugs.

He also let me on all the inside and juicy stuff around this place, for just a little kid he's got a LOT of inside information, most of which he's probably not supposed to know. Plus he's really a sweet kid, I can see him as the 'little brother' of this house and at least he tried to make the chore a little more easier and I guess he did, he's not as annoying as some of the others...so...I guess he's alright.

Well I guess that's enough for now, it's been kind of quiet here lately, so I guess that means something big will happen soon the way things happen in this house I just hope it's not too bad...but then again you never know what will happen next.


	4. 4th entry

The Uncanny R-Man: Glad you liked the prank and the idea of what she found just popped into my head and I couldn't resist, the imagery alone would make you sympathetic to her.

Xmenfan: If you read the adjustments and are familiar with Avenger comics then you should know who Wanda will hook up with for the time being. Besides Piotr is taken remember? I didn't know about that part of Jean's past I'll look it up. And Polaris will be in this and thanks for the protective big sister idea, I'll use that later on and be PATIENT, I got lots of stuff to do and I will eventually get it done.

Damn-my-name-was-taken: You know if could say one thing about your reviews they are never boring.

slickboy444: If you read adjustments then you know that this chapter will be about Polaris.

Ldypebsaby: Yeah when she gets to school THAT will be interesting to write about, glad you like the insights I put in.

Ruby631: Glade you liked it and as for Romy that is so wrong in so many ways.

Thanks to: Proponent of EVO,

**AN:** Okay until I get more reviews for Exiles that me and The Uncanny R-Man work really hard on, I won't update this story, so if you want more read and review that story too, sorry but I want more feed back for it, well except for you Ruby and D-M-N-W-T you're the most loyal readers I think for that story and thank you for it.

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**WANDA'S THOUGHTS**  
  
It's official my life is now a soap opera, not to mention everyone else here too. First we get a surprise visit from Fury and his own mutant team called X-Force. Then there's this girl with green hair and magnetism for powers. Now when I heard that were powers were the same as my father and she didn't know who her real father was...well I HAD to know the truth.

So what did I do? I walked right up to her and demanded a blood test. What can I say? I HAD to know, I mean what are the odds of someone else having the same powers as Magneto who wasn't related? Okay so Pietro and I don't have magnetic powers either but then again she STILL could have inherited it from Magneto too.

So I ask Hank for a blood test and guess what? Turns out I got a little half-sister in the world...to be honest I think I'm still in shock from in all. I mean I heard about Sarah finding out that doctor was her mother, now that's harsh. She's been a little distance from everyone...more so then usual, not that I blame her I think she's needs time to come to terms with what she just learned, like I do.

But here I am...with a little sister in the world...I don't know what to feel to be honest I mean hear I thought I only had my psycho of a father and an annoying brother but I got a sister. I mean sure when I was younger I thought it would be cool to have a little sister...and now I got on...just goes to show be careful what you wish for.

Before the test proved that they were related I was nearly going out of my mind with it all. I mean first my father leaves me and my brother a couple of years after we were born apparently no wonder I don't remember we couldn't have been more then two years old. So what does he do? He goes and finds some woman, knocks her up and then leaves her.

Yeah...real nice guy my father.

What was he doing? Making a spare kid or something? I wouldn't be surprised not after everything he's pulled so far. So what does that mean exactly? Did that mean he never loved my mother and he just used her to make Pietro and me? Was that it? I mean was our mother only a damn incubator for him and that's it?

God and I thought I hated him before now I hate him more then I ever thought possible. If I ever see him again he's got a LOT of explaining to do to me, that is if I can hold off kicking that stupid helmeted butt of his around the place. Then I got a few choice words with Pietro next.

At least Simon helped me get my mind off things and made me think about accepting Lorna if the test was positive, which it was.

Simon...there's just something about him...I don't know...I mean okay sure he's cute, okay he's a drop-dead hunk and I can see why he was in movies. (Mental note look up his work) Plus he wasn't as stuck up or phony like I'd expect, I guess working for the government might have helped with that or it was something else.

I mean with his eyes like that, I can see why he had to quite show business. Kind of hard to hide that from the public, not to mention I don't remember seeing any mutants in films or TV...well unless you count the news, but those guys don't have a clue what's really going on with mutants so I don't count them.

I guess after losing all his fame and fortune must have humbled him or something, at least he was nice company.

Plus he wasn't afraid of me like most people are. In fact he just smiled at me...and it was a nice smile too. Anyway he got me thinking and maybe it wouldn't be so bad after all. We ended up talking and he was actually kind of interesting, you'd never know the things he'd seen or done in Hollywood, I mean I knew some celebrities were a little out there, but the stuff you never hear about is a whole new level. I may never look at the cast of a few TV shows the same again after some of the stories he told me. But they really were good stories and it was nice to talk with someone who wasn't intimidated by me, I mean sure I can talk to the others here but there's this little undertone from me being on the 'other side' as it were...not that I can blame me...at least they're trying to make me feel at home.

Simon however seemed like a nice guy...not to mention BUILT. Damn I mean the guy looks like an action star, but what really gets me...is that before he left he asked me if he could call me... I didn't know what to say to that and just stood there dumbfounded like a stupid idiot or something.

I mean here's this nice, really, really good-looking guy asking if he can call ME. Me of all people, the guy can most likely get any girl he wanted so why me? After I got over the shock I was surprised when I actually said yes! I mean why did I say THAT?

...I wonder when he's going to call...STOP IT. I mean it's not like he's really going to call me, he was most likely just being nice...I think...it's not like he's interested in me...is he?

Anyway I'm still not sure about the Lorna as my half-sister thing. I mean I think it's kind of...nice I guess. I mean we talked after we learned about the results and we started to get to know one another. She's a LOT different then me, but then again her mother raised her, while I spent most of my time in an asylum...but she's a good kid though.

She's easier to get along with then Pietro that's for sure, I mean he was annoying all the time, never shut up and only thought about himself...maybe with her I can have a nicer sibling relationship that I never had. She gave me a contact number, both for the phone and an e-mail address so we can keep in touch.

She seems a little nice, maybe a little naive too but I guess she's had a lot more sheltered life then I ever had. Then I saw her gushing all over Summers' little brother Alex like a little school girl, it's hard to believe we're actually related when she acts like that, you'd never catch me acting that way to a guy.

But at least she has good tastes, Alex is a little more lose and more fun then Scott and he seems nice and all but I just got a new little sister and I'll be damned if I let someone hurt her. So if he breaks her heart or something...well...he knows that I know which room he sleeps in.

I'm not sure why I'm overprotective...maybe because no one was there for me, and I don't want her to go through some of the stuff I had to go through and also maybe to have the things I never had either. I wish I had someone to look out for me, to care for me...but I didn't.

I hate my old life...I hate my past...I hate my family...except for her. I don't feel any hatred for her, so maybe that's why I'm starting to care...because it's one of the few things I don't hate and I don't want to lose that. Kind of like my life now...I don't hate it now.

I have a home, I'm starting to work on real friendships and there are people that for the first time in so long that actually care what happens to me.

It's nice. For the first time I'm starting to feel at home and I'm starting to like my life.

...Great Kitty calling me saying someone is one the phone for me, who would call me?

Oh God he actually called! I know Simon said he would but I didn't think he actually would. We talked for over an hour just talking...it was nice. And he ACTUALLY said he wanted to see me again, I don't know why but when he asked that my stomach felt weird and I could have swore my heart rate jumped. Then I acted like a complete idiot, oh God I swore I was babbling a yes to him...I NEVER babble so why now?

I'm just lucky no one was around to hear that...if anyone had I would have found a nice rock to hide under and die...why does he make me feel this way? Anyways I'm going to see him in a few days, he's got some time off he said coming and he wants to meet with me again on that day.

Why does he want to meet with me?

It's not like he's attracted to me or I turn guys heads everywhere I go. I'm not like some of the other girls here that I could name (little miss perfect Jean Grey for starters) I mean the only guy to look at me was Toad and I'm NOT going down THAT train of thought again. But Simon is the exact opposite of Toad. He's handsome, nice...and has a nice ass too.

That's it, it's official I'm spending WAY too much time with a few of those girls...especially Tabitha. That girl is a bad influence on me if I'm starting to think of things like THAT...but he does though.

And it would be nice to see him again, I mean we have nice talks and stuff. Plus everyone is buzzing planning some birthday party for one of the students, one of the newer guys, that Vincent guy.

Okay he's nice and all but we're not exactly friends and I just moved in so I didn't see the point of getting him anything. In fact he's told everyone like me, Paige, Sarah, and Piotr not to get him anything since we all just got here and we're not under any obligated to get him anything. That was my thoughts too, at least now I won't feel any guilt...maybe I'll just get him a card though...he has been nice to me, so I guess I should give him something at least.

Well it's getting late and I should turn in soon, I got yet ANOTHER Danger Room session early in the morning with that task master Wolverine, I swear the guy loves to put us through all that stuff for fun.


	5. 5th entry

The Uncanny R-Man: Glad you like them, and I hope you like it. You know I think I'm the only writer to have Wanda paired up with Wonder Man.

Pyro Lady: Simon William AKA Wonder Man who is part of X-Force, which was introduced in my Adjustments story. This all takes place in my AGU series of stories, and some of the things you've read about are from some of my past stories too.

TheLegendaryManHimself: Thanks for saying that, I try my best to get into the heads of the characters. Plus I'm trying to make her grow as a person like the others a little. I like doing this cause it lets me explore the workings of a person's mind. Thanks for that review keep it up if you want this fic to live on.

Xmenfan: I'm glad you think she deserves to be happy so do I, and that's exactly how she sees Jean at the moment but remember that this is the first time they meet not as enemies so it will take some time, remember something like what they went through isn't easy to talk about so be patient it will come out in time, I want to take my time with certain parts of my story. And how come you didn't review for Exiles like I asked? READ THE AUTHOR'S NOTES!

slickboy444: It will be awhile when Wanda does confront Magneto but it will be one heck of a scene to write when I get to it. Although I'm sad you weren't one of the ones that tried to help out and review Exiles like I asked everyone last chapter in the author's notes.

Ldypebsaby: Maybe the girls will or won't, depends on if they find out about her seeing him. Plus why didn't you review for Exiles liked I asked everyone? You do realize I said if I didn't get enough reviews for that story I wouldn't update this one right?

Ruby631: Yes she does, but you got to admit having a life that has sucked so much I think she's entitled to it. Not like she could get it out before being locked up for most of her life.

Thanks to: Damn-my-name-was-taken

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**READ THIS:** First off DON'T skip this, this time! Now last chapter I said I wouldn't update this story if no one reviewed for Exiles and I was kind of disappointed that only 3 of you did. (Two of which always do review) Now this still holds, if you really do like this and want it to continue on, then please review the Exiles fic, Me and R-Man work really hard on it. If you don't like it then tell us why? We would like feed back so please review it.

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**WANDA'S THOUGHTS  
**  
Well today was yet another interesting day here...I'll say this about living here at the Institute, it's never boring.

Well Rogue and I had another argument two days ago, at least they're not as hostile as they used to be. It was just that I moved her nail polish to make room for mine and she couldn't find her own. So we started to argue about who gets to put what where. I mean okay sure it _was_ her room first but it's _our_ room now. I just wanted space for my stuff too.

Besides red is a better color then that purple stuff she puts on her nails anyway I mean she didn't used to put that on since she wore gloves all the time but I guess now that she stopped wearing them she's got some time to make up for.

Plus the fact she borrowed by Anne Rice novel without asking, luckily I had just finished it but still. At least we got nearly the same tastes in music so we're not bothered by it too much when one of us has got a CD playing.

Although last night was kind of hard on her, I woke up to her talking in her sleep but it didn't look like a good dream. She woke up nearly screaming. After a few seconds of calming herself down she went to the personal bathroom connected to our room like all the ones have. She closed the door but I could hear she was slightly upset about something.

When she got back I couldn't take not knowing what was happening and I asked her. She was surprised I was awake. She told me it was just a nightmare but then I knew that, I asked if she wanted to talk about it, but she told me she didn't feel right about it since it wasn't one of her nightmares.

That confused me until she told me that besides having the memories of everyone stuck inside her head she has their nightmares at times too.

I never knew her powers did that...having nightmares is bad enough...but to have other people's nightmares from time to time too...well that just sucks. I asked her if she was all right but she said she was fine.

Apparently it's a rare thing that happens to her and it had started to fade away. I'm not sure if she was telling the truth or not but I let it go. Besides it was getting late and we both needed sleep for tomorrow. But I will say this...I never knew Rogue had to put up with so much with her powers until tonight. She's a strong person to be able to live with all of that stuff in her head.

I may never say this to her face or admit it to anyone...but I think I have some new respect for her for all that she must go through.

Oh and did I mention the 'fun' we had the yesterday? Well first it was Vince's birthday, I just got him a card since I don't know him that well but he didn't seem to mind. I figured since he's been nice to me it was the least I could do, plus he seemed to like the thought of it too so that was good. The party wasn't too bad actually.

I was actually starting to have a good time, the food was good, and so was the music. Everyone was happy and enjoying themselves plus I've haven't really been to a birthday in years, not to mention had one myself, so it was good to be a part of something like this. It's just one more thing that I'm getting back that was taken from me.

It was going great then that damn Selene woman had to show up. She just appeared in flames wearing something that made her look like some kind of dominatrix from a porno or something. She kidnapped a few of the others, not to mention the way she knocked down Xavier. Now I know I'm not exactly the typical 'good guy' since I was on Magneto's side and all, but what she did to Xavier a man who has done nothing but help me and care for me...I was furious, I wanted nothing more then to hurt that woman at the moment but I wasn't sure what would have happened to the others if I did. Apparently she kidnapped them in order to force us to fight and of course we had to go and fight and I said we I mean I went too.

I was surprised when Xavier wanted me and Piotr to go with them. It was a little weird fighting on their side, sure I did it during the Apocalypse thing...but now I was one of them this time and not just some ally. It was strange...but also felt good too. I mean here I was part of a team again fighting to save their own...or...should I say _our _own. It's still feels odd me being fighting with them like this.

We landed in a gravel pit and saw these Hellions of hers. With the exception of this blond in white the others were dressed in these red uniforms that all matched. During the battle I fought this French blond girl called Roulette. Talk about slutty, I mean she had her top zipped down showing her cleavage to the entire world to see on purpose. Her powers apparently are basically like mine only she uses these energy disks instead of the hex bolts that I use.

Another thing I learned the hard way that day? Her powers and mine don't mix well. When her disk and my hex bolt collided they merged then exploded. From now on I got to remember not to do that again, that had hurt. But at least that Selene woman lost her concentration and the others got freed and then they were outnumbered.

Boy did they take off fast after that, I think I actually smiled when I saw them take off like that.

On the way back Logan took Piotr and me aside and told us he was proud of our first time out. I don't know why but it felt...nice. I mean I can't remember the last time someone gave me any kind of actual praise like that...well...at least for doing something good. Instead of the praise I got at my time with the Brotherhood, they only seemed to praise me when I did something for their enjoyment. Like when I messed with the X-Men's powers at the zoo...I guess I should apologize for that...one day.

Anyway Logan said that he'd talk to Xavier and see if we both would be assigned to the X-Men. Now I'm not sure how to feel about that. Sure I think I'm powerful enough to be in the main group...but it feels weird. I mean I've thought of the X-Men as enemies for so long...now I'm about to be one of them.

But then I think of how that would make Magneto feel and it puts a smile on my face so maybe it's a good thing after all. I wonder if they'll make me change my uniform, personally I like the way it is. If I have to I guess I could place some kind of black X on it somewhere...but only if I have to, I like it too much as it is to change it too much.

Unfortunately the party pretty much died after that. Amara went to her room to 'shower and get clean' whatever that meant. I get the feeling some other then seeing her worse nightmare (Selene) again. I tried to ask Tabitha and she told what the creep Empath did to her and said that what he wanted to do to her. If I ever see that guy again he better run. I had to live with that kind of terror since I was fifteen when I was locked up. Thankfully none of the guards got the guts to try anything like that with me.

Even though I still get nightmares of being in that place...and of some of the things that had happened...but I don't want to talk about any of that but I'm sure Xavier will want me too...why can't he just let it go...I do.

But I swear if that little jerk tried anything he'll have me to face, Amara may be a little uptight or slightly stuck-up sometimes...but she's nice and she's easy to get along with, plus she doesn't deserve anything like that Empath jerk wanted to do.

I swear that guy just made the top of my 'who to hex' list...well...maybe number three. Magneto and Pietro are still in numbers one and two of that list.

I still wonder if we'll see Selene again? I mean she did look pretty pissed but I must say when I saw Logan clock her. That was great, she really deserved that big time. Although I guess we will be seeing more of those guys soon...I mean if that place that's being built over the old Brotherhood place is where they'll be putting up shop then I guess we will.

You know it kind of funny. Here I am once a member of the 'other team' and not long after I switch sides and the old team is gone, the old Brotherhood is replaced. Now I guess I will know how the X-Men had felt with us living in Bayville. It's like some cosmic scale that had to be balanced out. One team leaves and another takes it place.

Only this seems to be filled up with stuck-up, jerks. Man if the Brotherhood thought that the 'x-geeks' were bad these guys are worse! But now that I am an 'x-geek' now I guess there are a few things I got to get used to. Plus this place isn't as bad as the others had made out...wish I had known that before or else I would have switched sides long ago, but at least I'm here now...and I don't regret it.

Well I knew things would be different for me when I accepted coming here, I just wonder what else could possibly happen, although I wouldn't mind it if I didn't see those Hellions or Selene anytime soon.

Although I can't wait until Simon gets his day off...I know how that sounds but I'm actually looking forward to it...I wonder what I should wear? Great...I'm starting to sound like Kitty...I'm doomed...damn what now?

There's something going on out back...I think a few of the younger guys are getting rowdy or something...I guess I better put the fear of death into them to make them cut out that racket. It's already been a day since the attack and everyone is tense enough as it is, well this shouldn't take long to straighten them out.


	6. 6th entry

Damn-my-name-was-taken: It's for reading and reviewing (or whatever it is those things you leave behind are) that's why you're on the 'thanks' list.

Red Witch: thanks I really do appreciate it and I know you can get busy that's why I didn't hound you when you stopped reviewing, but still thanks.

Celtcath74: Glad you found what I said about Selene's outfit funny, and that you enjoy Wanda's views on the others.

Xmenfan: Thanks for reading the other story, And I can tell Wanda's you favorite, she's one of mine too and that's why I placed her with the X-Men cause I felt she deserved batter. Colossus will be part of the X-Men and don't forget that both Bobby and Vincent were placed in the X-Men team also in Enter Daytripper.

slickboy444: Thanks, I try my best to keep her the same yet still make her character slowly grow as a person too. It's not all easy but I'm glad you and other people like it.

Thanks to: The Uncanny R-Man, TheLegendaryManHimself, Proponent of EVO, Ruby631

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**WANDA'S THOUGHTS**

I just can't believe that last few days. First off...I actually had a date, my first real date. I mean I wasn't sure at first, I thought it was just him and me going out as friends or something. I mean Simon was a Hollywood star, he must have been on tons of dates with other Hollywood types...so why does he like me?

I mean he's this big, hot looking star and I'm just this angry Goth girl...what does he see in me? I mean...I don't turn heads like other girls so why me? But then at the end of the date when he asked me out for another and to keep in touch...I was shocked.

Then he kissed me.

I mean...wow...it was...it was amazing. I've never felt so good and never thought a kiss could be just...so great.

I've never felt like this before, or about anyone like this about anyone. I just feel so warm inside when I think of him and our time together. I got an e-mail from him and get this...he actually wrote me a poem. I mean how corny is that?

But it was nice...even if it was a little corny. No one has ever done anything like that for me. There's no way I would tell anyone about this...at least not here, yet. I've seen what the younger students to do Jean and Scott, Kurt and Amanda and even Rogue and Vincent. Although I think Jean and Scott are the favorite targets because they're the oldest, and little uptight at times.

So... I talked to Lorna. I mean I got hold of one of the computers for an IM to see if she was on-line. We actually talked about it and she seemed happy, she even told me Simon was whistling for over an hour when he got back.

We talked for nearly two hours and to tell the truth is was nice. It was also kind of strange talking to her, I mean I know we are half-sisters, but we only just met. I guess this is the kind of stuff that sisters talk about...I guess. This whole sister thing is new to me so I'm not sure what exactly to do, I'm just making it up as I go along. Storm I think is one of the few people here with a sister so I guess she might know how you're supposed to act towards them, I also heard Jean's got a younger sister too.

Maybe I'll ask one of them sometime...alone, I'm not exactly comfortable coming to people with this stuff. I've been alone for so long it's strange how now suddenly it seems I'm not alone. I mean at the Brotherhood place sure there were the others. But they were mostly afraid of me and left me alone most of the time.

But here there are those that actually try and help me here. I mean there are Xavier and his sessions with him trying to get through all my anger. I still can't believe I just broke down like that, I'm not some weakling, I'm not some pathetic girl that breaks down and cries all the time...but I did.

And he just held me when I did. I can't remember anyone ever doing that before, especially my father. It was nice. I mean I never felt so...well...so loved at that point. I mean Agatha tried to help me but I never let her get close.

I was also surprised at what had happened to him. I mean I never though he had to go through something like that. He seems so together but I saw the pain even he hides from everyone that day. I saw that even he knew what it was like to have a rotten parent in their life. I mean Xavier has done nothing but try to help me and I've never had someone that was so concerned with me in my life.

I really wished Xavier had found me years ago. It would have been nice to have spent my life living here with him instead of that horrible place.

I just thought of something...what if I had? Then I would have grown up here and I would have turned out all different then I am now but also would have spent a good deal of time with Scott and Jean too. Would we have been friends? I mean if I had been here then we would have lived together, how would I have turned out? Would I still be a Goth? I doubt it. I mean...I think I would have had a good childhood for a chance.

Sure I would be different but...but at least I wouldn't have gone through all of that. When I think about it things would definitely have been different. I would always have been a part of the X-Men and never part of the Brotherhood. Thinking on how things could have worked out...I'm starting to wish I had come here from the beginning.

Then I wouldn't have the nightmares for starters.

I still have them. Of being locked up in that place, last night I had a bad one and my powers went a little out of control and I nearly trashed the room. Rogue woke me up thankfully. She didn't ask me what was wrong...she just asked me if I wanted her to stay up with me. I was surprised at this, but...then again if anyone knows what it's like to be haunted by nightmares (even not your own) then she did.

I said thanks but I just too tired to stay up. Rogue and me may have our differences but I think on some things we have an understanding on a few others. Not many people know what it's like to be alone in the world, to feel isolated, but she does. I can see that now as I've gotten to know her more. Just one more thing we have in common I guess.

I also found out first hand why the others dodge Kitty's cooking. She made these 'brownies' she called them, and they looked okay but when I ate one of those things I swear it was like kissing Toad. They were disgusting. How in the world that girl hasn't been banned from the kitchen is beyond me.

I think this place is starting to change me though. I mean before I can here I was isolated, angry and sad all the time. Now not so much. I mean I can't believe this is happening but I'm actually starting to make friends I think. At the Brotherhood they accepted me, but I never really felt like a friend, more like one of them.

Here some of the others are warming up to me, even Gale wanted to know if I wanted to go out with her and a few of the others uptown. I had some studying to do so I had to turn it down...but it felt nice to be asked that.

The Brotherhood did ask me to come alone with their stuff at times and I had nothing better to do, but I'm not sure if it was just because they wanted me along or just in case they might need me. Whatever, it was still nice of Gale to ask and I know it was because she wanted me to join them and not for any other reasons.

I think maybe I'm starting to fit in around this place. I mean not long ago my life was so different, now I'm getting ready for school (oh the joy of _that_) starting to make friends...and I got a boyfriend. I mean sure it's long distance but...well...I've never had one before...and it's nice, I mean he's really nice to me.

Plus he's a great kisser too.

You know...I wonder what Magneto and Pietro would think of this? I bet neither of them would be happy about me dating a guy working for the government. I be that will piss them off and that's good news to me. After all they did to me it's a small pay pack for everything. They've lied, manipulated me and abandoned me.

At least nothing like _that_ will happen here.

Lorna told her mother about me apparently. She told me her mother was shocked to say the least that the man she knew as Eric Lensherr was an evil mutant terrorist and had kids of his own. She also said her mother wants to meet with me sometime. I don't know about that.

I'm not sure if I'm ready I mean...this is the woman my father was with right after my mother, and there are a few things, like did my father leave my mother for this woman? Was he having an affair with her? Or did he meet her until after my mother was dead?

I don't think I could get those answers out of her...but...I'll think about it. Lorna was all excited about it she went on, and on about how we could sleep in her room at night and talk and stuff like real sisters. I think she's more accepting to having a big sister being an only child. At least until now.

So maybe I will...when I feel like I'm ready for it but not yet. She also told me to ask if Alex was free. She wants to drop by and see him. I wish I knew how she could get to wherever it was to here so fast, but she told me it was top secret.

Anyways maybe while she's in the area we can get together later or something. We never got a chance to really talk the first time she was here and after our talking to each other over the phone, e-mails and a IM chatting, I'd like for a more personal talk with her.

Anyways things are going okay now. I mean Dr. Strange's spells are most likely keeping that woman Selene gone. I still can't believe she just showed up like that and nearly took us all out. I still can't believe some of the crazy things too. Like that Johnny guy, Illyana's new boyfriend turning into the biker from hell was a surprise. Not to mention the others.

I mean that girl all in black with the fire powers was actually Selene's own daughter. And from what she told us she sounds like she would be a perfect match for my dad. I mean they both got huge egos, a vengeful side and they ditch their kids into hellholes when they don't want to deal with them.

At least August was lucky enough for Dr. Strange to get her out. Limbo sounds even worse then the asylum, at least any of the monsters there were human. I still heard what a few of them had done to some of the other females there. It wasn't pretty and I'm glad none of them had the guts to try that with me.

Yeah Illyana and her friends definitely came at the right moment. I saw how Piotr looked when his sister was gone again as she had to go back with the others to Dr. Strange's place. I could see how he missed her already. Why couldn't Pietro had shown concern like that for me? I wish Pietro had been more like Colossus I mean maybe he would have done something to protect me, or had gotten me out.

I guess now that I'm the big sister that falls under me. Well strange as it sounds, I want to do it. No one had been there for me until now and I want to make sure my little sister has someone to turn to. I won't abandon her like my brother and father abandoned me.


	7. 7th entry

Red Witch: Thanks I try at times. And I know all to well how things can get.

Megaroony: Thanks I just hope you know that this is part of my AGU series of fics and you can read about what she talks about in those fics too.

SumomotheChobit: I don't know, I just never liked them. Mostly cause of all the horrible Romy fics out there that I got sick of them. Plus they just don't seem to have much in common and in the series/comics they usually just end up hurting each other. (Mainly Remy hurting her or using her)

Xmenfan: Soon, you really need to learn some patience you know that? If you keep bugging me about it I might not do it just to spite you, or I'll do something like have Wanda's mind tampered again by Mastermind and work for Magneto or just kill her off. Yeah but don't forget how Jean treated the others before mutant were exposed, she ditched them and ignored them for the popular crowd and was just as uptight as Scott was.

Ruby631: Yeah, but he never came back for her, didn't even try so she might be a little upset about that.

slickboy444: Actually that thought gave me an idea for a small fic I might try out later, and AU where Wanda was with Xavier. Plus I always like to try and make the characters grow a bit whenever I can.

Thanks to: Winblades, Damn-my-name-was-taken, TheLegendaryManHimself

* * *

**WANDA'S THOUGHTS**

I hate to admit it but I actually am starting to like writing in this thing, I mean sure it's kind of stereotypical...but it is nice. Well thankfully things seemed to have calmed down around here, or at least as calm as they do get.

Bobby of course pulled a prank on Kurt who retaliated and then Bobby had to get him back and it went back and forth all day until they called a truce. I think it was when Kurt's fur was somehow dyed while taking a shower (mental note check shower head for dye when Bobby had me targeted) and when Bobby somehow got covered in feathers that they called it quits. (How Kurt managed that I don't know, but it was impressive)

And guess what happened today? I went out to the pool to get a little sun and then I got pushed in the damn pool by Roberto. It might have been funny except for one thing...I don't know how to swim. I was so scared cause I was in the deeper end where I couldn't stand but luckily Jean was there and got me out with her powers.

Roberto of course said he was sorry and kept on apologizing either because he was sorry or he didn't want me to get him back, most likely both. Well I was too busy coughing to hex him at the moment anyway. (Mental note: get revenge on Sunspot)

Well you'd think they would have figured out by then that I don't swim since I was never in the pool all this time. Well except in the shallow end and I stood most of the time. So now Xavier wants me to learn how to swim, he said it was good for me and he also said that it might save my life at one point. I wasn't going to argue with him about it.

Actually I stopped arguing about him about a lot of things now...I guess it's because I like him too much to do it. Well then I got swimming lessons now. Ororo is teaching me and my first lesson was the simple things like how to float and tread water and stuff.

When she had me on my back in the water and was holding me above the water with just her hands I kind of freaked a little. But she calmed me down and even though it took a few times I finally leaned how to float a bit in the water. The treading was tougher, I had to keep kicking this certain way and moving my arms too. It was tiring but after a while she told me to stop.

Tomorrow we do it again and she said that next week she would show me the back and breast stokes. Personally I feel like a kid, hell even Jamie and Paige and swim damn it and they're the youngest! Just another thing that I missed out on in my childhood. In fact when I was watching those two have a good time I felt like I did miss out on a lot.

After the pool incident I sat down and watched the others and I mean really watched them. Everyone was having fun and then I noticed a few other things too. Rahne had asked her new boyfriend Joseph over and I watched them.

They were so sweat on each other, and he was so kind and they both blushed several times from something the other said or did, sometimes both of them. Like when he saw her in that swimsuit he looked like he was in heaven. Then I thought back to when I was Rahne's age and I got depressed. I never had the kind of childhood that she has here.

I felt like so much of my life has been stolen from me. The years I spent locked up I should have been out with friends, going to school, going to parties, having a good time, not to mention dates. I feel like I'm trying to catch up sometimes on all that I've missed out on.

Well at least now I seem to be. I mean I got some new friends; well I'm kind of working on that. The sleepover we had was fun and I liked it a lot, the birthday party (before Selene ruined it) was nice too. And now I got a boyfriend.

God I still can't believe it. I mean it just sounds so strange. Me, Wanda Maximoff has a boyfriend...I actually never thought I would find someone in this world that would like me, I mean I know I'm a little hard to get along with and I got a temper...but he still likes me. I still don't know why but I'm thankful for it. He makes me feel better about myself and he makes me happy.

Plus he's a really good kisser.

I've only been out with him a few times but I'm really like him. I mean I keep e-mailing him all the time and talk over the phone when I can. Sure it's kind of hard him being away but when I do see him it's a lot better and I feel so happy to just see him again. But then I miss him when he's not here though.

Although I did have the strangest dream...I was older and get this. I was working with him with SHEILD and then I was getting married to him. He looked so handsome everyone form the Institute and the X-Force guys were there, Lorna was my maid of honor and Xavier gave me away then after it...well...it gets kind of personal at that point, but you get the idea.

God am I falling in love with him? I mean I don't know what love is, so how do I know? And how far is this relationship going to go too? I've thought about a few things like what am I going to do after I'm done high school or get a GED whatever works out for me, but then I got no idea.

Although I do like it here, I have thought about joining SHEILD, I mean I would get to be with my sister and boyfriend...but I don't want to leave this place. This place is starting to fee like the first real home I've had in a long time. Plus there's the fact I'm not sure about something else. Mainly sex. I mean I like Simon and I'm eighteen, I've seen enough R rated movies to know what sex is and Mystique did tell me a few of the female things that happen at puberty, but beyond that I don't know.

I mean how do you know you want to go that far and should you? It's times like this I wish my mom was here, I know she would have helped me through this and a lot of other things too...maybe I can ask some of the older girls or go to Ororo, I get the feeling she might have a few of the answers.

Speaking of relationships I swear if Alex is just playing with Lorna's feelings then I am going to kill him. In fact I said as much to his face and also warned Scott that if he value's his little brother's life he'll make sure of it. Lorna is the only family I got left that I'm on speaking terms with and I want to have a least a chance at a good relationship, unlike I had with Pietro when I got out.

I still wonder about him, I know he betrayed me by keeping the fact that my memories were altered and lied to me about it too...but he's still my brother, my twin. Plus I need to talk to him, I need to get all this stuff I have to say to him out of me. I just want to start letting go of all the pain I have inside me. That's one of the things Xavier has helped me to see.

That I don't need to keep all this pain and anger inside me, plus there are a few thing I just have to saw to his face and a few questions. Like why he never came for me, I know I asked that before but he said he couldn't remember the place, but did he ever bother to try and look for it? To look for me? Plus I need to ask him if he knew about Lorna. I need to know what other things he's kept from me, and I need to tell him how he hurt me by lying to me all those months.

I guess I just want some closure or something...

Anyway I can't wait for these damn renovations to come along. At least then I'll get my own room again, nothing against Rogue or anything but I just need my own space and I think she would agree with me on that one.

Sometimes it would be nice to have a quiet place where I can relax and stuff, there isn't much of that to go around lately but I guess that's another reason for it, plus I heard Warren is trying to get as many work crews as he can get from his business contacts since then it would be faster and take less time. I also heard him grumble about having to pay extra for 'compensation' for working here. I guess some people don't care if you're a mutant if you pay them enough.

Oh yeah I forgot, I got a test today too. After all the studying Mr. McCoy made out a test for my and Sarah, both different of course. I think he did it so he could feel like a teacher again, I do feel kind of sorry he lost out on that, he is a great help to me with the studying, I'm just worried that I failed the stupid thing, I mean that was my first test...ever. Well it would fit my life if I did fail it, I mean so far my life hasn't had the greatest track record that I got to admit.

Well...before I came to live here anyways at least.

I heard from Lorna today, she told me she still wants me to spend the weekend at her house with her mom so she could meet me, and so we can have a 'sisters weekend' together. I'm not sure what that means but I guess I would find out if I go. I'm still a little uneasy about it, I mean this woman was the one my father had gone off with not long after my own mother must have died.

I mean how do you face someone like that? It's not that I hate her or anything but...it would just be strange. But I got to admit if I want to be a sister to Lorna I should do this at one point, plus it would help me to get to know her better seeing the home she lived in and all. I'll ask Xavier about this and see what he thinks then get back to her, maybe we can schedule something in or something.

Well I guess that's all I got to say, I mean I guess in a few days I'll know about that but there seems to be some meeting everyone is supposed to go to now, something about the new improvements for the mansion. I just hope I get my own room after all of this though.


	8. Final entry

celtcath74: Yeah that's why I liked to do this, I like the insight of a character, really getting into their mind.

TheLegendaryManHimself: The SHEILD thing was mainly from that vision you see of the 'future' at the end of the show. Yeah I like how over time she's changing, which is want I wanted to show

Xmenfan: Yes she will soon, and I've commented a lot of times that the studies get a little freaked out at that telepathic stuff I just got tired of commenting on it.

Ruby631: Yeah that will be interesting to see for both of those.

slickboy444: Yeah she will meet her, and I really wanted her to have at least some family life that was better then she had.

Thanks to: The Uncanny R-Man, Red Witch, fire inu, Damn-my-name-was-taken

* * *

**WANDA'S THOUGHTS**

Well it's been awhile since I written I know but I've been getting use to life here and with all the damn studying _and_ Danger Room sessions to improve my teamwork abilities it's been kind of full lately. Although Xavier did give me the option of home studying for a GED then going to Bayville high if he thinks I'm not up to it. Personally I'm not sure of going there still.

I mean do I really want to try and go somewhere that people only glare at me with hatred? I got enough of that just walking the damn street in this place. Although that Town X sounds nice but I'll get to that later.

I'm still trying to get a hold of my anger just so I don't wreck this place, and he thinks I can handle high school? From what I heard there's no way I can go there and keep my cool. Besides he still hasn't heard from the new principle on whether the students can go there or not, I mean first off there's a lot more students now and after all the stuff that happened like Apocalypse. Ever since after that everyone has been a little tenser then normal.

It doesn't help matters with groups like the FOH, and people like Kelly out there.

It's time like this that taking a vacation in that Town X sounds like a nice thing. Now let me get to that place. A few days back something weird (basically Xavier picking up a whole lot of mutant signatures that appeared then vanished) and they decided to give Rogue a shot at command.

I swear she was so nervous she was getting on my nerves, I just lucky that whatever Vince did worked. Although I heard they had some trouble they also made contact with his hidden town and this group called the Mutant Underground. The town itself is isolated and from what I hear is Xavier's dream of humans and mutants living in peace made real. I still can't believe that there's an entire town where humans and mutants can get alone. Almost makes you feel there's hope for the future.

Almost, I'm still not sure but then again I'm a cynic. Hey a lifetime of misery, betrayal and pain does that to you.

I heard they got their own little X-Men team called the Protectors, and that they made a few friends there and get this…there's a damn fan club or something there. I mean us as celebrities, with people adoring us and looking up to us and stuff. It's just too strange.

But we were invited back and that's nice to know. Also I heard a few other things. I heard Rogue finally got laid. I mean the way those two go at it I'm surprised they lasted this long, then again from over two years of never touching I guess she's entitled to enjoy it for all it's worth. I must admit though she didn't keep it quiet for long. Man I still can't believe they got busted so fast.

It was also all over the mansion in minutes. I was in the rec room playing some pool with Amara and Tabitha and Gale when Jubilee ran in with all the gossip news. Not only did Rogue and Vince go all the way, but Jean and Scott also got outed and it seemed Kitty and Piotr shared a room. Although they didn't have any sex it seems just sleep in the same bed with their clothes on.

I swear it's no wonder Logan went straight to the Danger Room, it was so trashed Forge had to lend a helping hand with Hank to fix it. It was out of commission for the next day.

Now a few things got into my head from this. First off is now that it seems the adults are letting Jean and Scott continue on but also Rogue and Vince, as long as they keep things safe. I now have to be careful of walking in on them. At first it was them making out or something, now I have to worry about walking in on them having sex. It doesn't help matters that the rooms are kind of sound proof now so if she's screaming her head off I might not hear it until I open the damn door.

Although I think hearing Rogue scream out in passion is the ONE thing Kurt never wants to hear. You know ever since then he's never teleported into our room once, sell except for that prank but once again I'll get to that later.

The other thing that got me thinking was about Simon and me. Is he the man that I would want to go all the way with? I mean he's my first boyfriend and can I see myself going that far with him? Okay so maybe I've had a few dreams that were a little on the rated R side…okay maybe NC-17 would be more accurate.

I mean I never felt like this about anyone. Although I have to admit for my first boyfriend I hit the jackpot (although no one will hear me say that) He's really cute, he's nice to me, listens to me without judging and he just accepts me. Sometimes I feel like I don't deserve him.

But I am glad I have him in my life. He really knows how to get me to relax and to have fun. Plus I always get these strange feelings with him. I keep getting this funny feeling in my stomach and me knees get week a few times when he's close and especially when he kisses me. I swear that gets better all the time.

Great…he turns me into a damn gushing girly girl…if Kitty finds out I'll never hear the end of it. Luckily I only say this in my journal and if anyone still wants to live they won't take a look at this and if they don't want to die slowly and horribly then if they do they better keep their mouths shut. (And if anyone IS reading this you better remember THAT!)

Then of course I had the biggest laugh of my life. You see the one time Kurt has teleported into our room for a prank that was pulled on him by Rogue and Vince. He finally got something to get even with her and boy, that boy is devious. I mean I know Bobby likes to pull pranks but Kurt is the master, what he did to Rogue makes me not want to cross the fuzzy blue elf.

First he recruited Amanda and Blink. When Amanda busted into our room I thought she and Kurt had some kind of fight. It's not uncommon although those two rarely argue and it's not normally something serious. But she said she was pregnant THAT got my attention.

Both me and Rogue couldn't believe it. I mean I felt sorry for the girl she was only seventeen and was knocked up? I was thinking of how the others would react and her parents. Then Blink came in said they had another problem I wasn't sure what was going on then. Then when she said she got pregnant by Kurt too I was completely shocked. I mean I just couldn't see it.

Rogue was near panic or something at that point I could see her eyes widen so much I though they would bulge out of her head or something. Then when Kurt came in and the whole three-way thing came into play AND he wanted to shack up with BOTH girls I knew my jaw had dropped. Now since coming here I've seen some strange things but THAT took the cake. I mean I swear Rogue was an inch from fainting and if she was pale before she sure as hell was now. Then Blink sniggered and the others laughed.

It had all been a damn joke…and one hell of a good one too. I swear I NEVER laughed so much in my life! Seeing Rogue all freaked out like that was just priceless. I mean how can ANYONE top that?

Rogue of course had been in a sour mood (yeah I know, what else is knew, but she was more so now then usual) and the three teleporters had of course hidden from her all day. I heard Kurt and Amanda went out for the day and visited her parents (I'm glad Kurt is on their good side again). Blink stayed with Ororo for safety reasons.

That's another thing. I mean Ororo actually decided to fully adopt Blink so she'll be her foster mother and not just her guardian. I feel happy for her I really do…it's just…I wish I had someone like that in my life…someone who would be a parent to me…I never had that and I know who my father is.

When we were still a family he was never really there for us and then he sent me away, used me…God I sound like a damn broken record but then again HOW are you supposed to get over something like that? I don't think you can.

Great now I'm depressed again…

There have been so many times I wished my mom was still alive. I wanted to know her since I never got the chance too…I don't ever know what she looked like, Magneto never kept any pictures that I saw. I'm not sure what to make of that.

It would also have been nice to have at least ONE parent in my life…but that's not my life. There are times I just want to be held but that's never going to happen. I can't let everyone see that. That I have a moment of weakness now and then…I mean…I do have a reputation to keep. Plus I've been alone for so long it's hard for me to try and open up. I'm just so used to being alone and on my own.

I've never known what it was like to have someone to care for you and love you like that, like how some of these kids still have parents that care for them…well…I think Xavier is close and of course Logan is like the overprotective father/uncle figure. Ororo is nice as a mother figure and of course Hank is the kind smart and wise uncle.

Plus I guess all the other kids here are like 'brothers and sisters' to each other. Well expect for the couples of course, but I really can see the connection everyone has around here now.

Well my new sister Lorna FINALLY convinced me to see her mother. I mean I could use a break and I heard the construction crew is coming in a day or so to expand the mansion so I would like to get out of the way while they start. Plus I need to try and get to know my little sister…God it still feels so strange to say that…I'm the big sister…although with Pietro and I are twins I'm sure I'm the older one since he still acts like a child most of the time.

So maybe this won't be so new for me, at least Lorna seems to be more mature then Pietro is…or ever might be to be honest.

Plus I'm SURE Rogue will like having the damn room to herself…I just hope that if she has her boyfriend spend the night with her while I'm gone they stay the hell OFF my bed. If I find one damn wrinkle on my bed I'm BURNING the damn thing. There's no WAY I'm sleeping on the same bed she and him got 'frisky' on. And when I do leave for Lorna's I'm telling her that to her face.

Now that I think about it with Vince in here that would mean Piotr will be all alone…or in theory. I mean Kitty REALLY likes him that much everyone knows but I have to wonder if she wouldn't mind upgrading their relationship?

Piotr seems to be too shy to start something but I'm sure Kitty would be to start things off. But that's not my problem and I don't care either way.

Anyways that's it for now, I have to see what I need to take with me and go meet Lorna at the airport tomorrow too. I still can't believe she talked me into this…I just hope her mom likes me. I know this will be a little strange for the both of us but maybe I can get some answers to a few questions about my Magneto while I'm there.


End file.
